I just got back from a BIG family vacation to Disney World a few weeks ago.  It was a crazy, awesome time!  But more on that at a later date.

All at Disney - Majic Kingdom

Me and the Crew at Magic Kingdom, Disney World!

 

Yesterday was Sunday.  I would like to take a moment to focus on a little question that was made to me yesterday.  I was volunteering at my church, like I usually do, teaching in the 3-5-year-olds’ class.  It was near the end of the service when an associate of mine approached me and engaged me in a short conversation.  After exchanging pleasantries, we chatted briefly about our children.  As I was returning to my room to finish up, she whispered down the hall, “Psst…Are you Pregnant Again?

How should I feel?  Should I be shocked, dismayed, angry, annoyed, criticized, self-conscious, disgraced, scored and/or maybe embarrassed?  Doesn’t everyone know not to ask that question unless they are absolutely sure that the answer is “yes”?  Am I so big that I look pregnant?

“No, I’m done with all that,” was my simple reply and off I ran, back to my classroom.

Now, just before Christmas, with the approval of my doctor, I had slowly decreased a few of my medications and even cut one out altogether.  I did have some difficulties with the transition, including some moderate depression and fluctuating moods.  One pleasant side-effect (for me anyway) was that I lost a few pounds, without even trying (my dear husband likes me on the bigger side, however, so he wasn’t as thrilled with the change)!  The weight-loss wasn’t significant and my weight tends to fluctuate anyway, so it wasn’t a very big deal.  I really didn’t think anyone even noticed except for me and my husband.

A couple of weeks before we left to go on the vacation, I knew I needed to pull myself together so I’d be stable for what turned out to be a very unstable trip.  So, again, with the doc’s permission, I upped my doses of mood-stabilizers.  And with that increase, I regained some of those previously lost pounds.  “No biggie,” I punned to myself.  After all, I’ve been eating healthy foods, drinking tons of water and getting plenty of exercise.  The only change has been with my meds.  Some medications just have weight gain as a side-effect and it’s really, really hard to beat.

This past week, my sister and her two-year-old son were in town visiting and my now 9-year-old daughter had her birthday party at our house.  We had a great time, but some things were left undone.  For example, in the morning, as I was getting ready for church, I realized that I hadn’t done my laundry in over a week!  Really the only clean, decent thing I had to wear was an extra large tank top or a tiny tube top.  I decided that the tube top might be indecent for church, because for pants, of course, I was going to wear leggings. But then again, the large tank top was so loose that my cleavage would show.  So, I wore both; the tube underneath to cover my boobage and the tank over it to cover the tube’s tightness.   I wasn’t worried about how big the shirt was, it was long enough to cover my bum, plus I was going to wear an accentuating sweater to tie the ensemble together anyway.

My thought process while actually getting ready was really not that sophisticated.  I mean, who am I there to impress?  God loves me no matter what.  And three, four, and five-year-olds don’t care what you wear.  So I went to church and did my service.  While singing and dancing with the kiddies, I got hot, so hot, in fact, that I took my sweater off. The only thing I felt slightly self-conscious about was the large scar I have on my back, part of which was partially exposed because my hair was up.  It was shortly after that, that the comment was made…

Psst…Are you Pregnant Again?”

How should I feel?  Insulted.  I should feel insulted; throw that tank top away, go on a strict diet, starve myself, and quit taking my stupid medications that cause the stupid side-effect!

But the more I thought about it, the less insulted I felt.  I began to have a fresh perspective.  I decided not to accept it as an insult.  And here’s why:

  1. Someone thought I was enough of a Super Mommy to actually handle another kid, (especially another baby).
  2. I’m no spring chicken.  I’m not old but at age 35, the ob-gyn docs start considering you as a “high risk” patient.  I could take the comment as a compliment, even.  I look young enough to want to have more children!
  3. I’ve heard this same woman talk before.  I don’t think she tries to be mean or insulting.  I think she’s just insensitive.  And maybe she doesn’t even realize she’s saying something that others may find offensive.
  4. I really just don’t care that much about what other people think about me anymore.  Why should I let one comment bash my self-esteem when I know I’m trying my best?
  5. I don’t think I look pregnant.  Why should I care if one other person on this planet does?

20170308_Pretty Mommy 2

A very recent picture of my (not-pregnant) self!

 

So after this post, I’m going to “Let It Go;” like water off a duck’s back.

water off donald duck's back

 

Double Talk Quote: (And this is a coincidence…) “Mommy, can you give me some insults?” – Mica, after our first day at Disney World.  She was trying to say “insoles” for her shoes because her feet hurt from walking so much.

Bible Verse: “Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.” 1 Peter 3:9

Word that has Lost its meaning: insulted

Relatable Lyrics:  “Let It Go” – Disney’s Frozen

“Let it go, let it go… I don’t care, what they’re going to say…”

Disney - Epcot - Me Mommy Belle at Epcot with the girls, Bella, Micaela, and Grace; Elsa and Anna

Me and my girls at Epcot

 

 

 

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Comments on: "“Psst… Are You Pregnant Again?”" (20)

  1. Sheesh!! You scared me there for a minute!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I did a double take on the photos and you look great! I’m not sure what that lady was thinking when she asked but I’m glad you have a wonderful fresh perspective. I really enjoyed that. And especially if there is a medical reason behind it. (I take medicine and it makes me bloat, and my post pregnancy skin bulges out a bit somedays :0) I hope you enjoyed your wonderful vacation! Will be looking forward to reading about it!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for the compliment! I did thoroughly enjoy the vacation. As far as the comment goes, my shirts probably made me look frumpy that day or something. The medications do correspond to my weight, though, so I can’t blame it ALL on my clothes!!!

      I know what you mean about the post-pregnancy body woes. I’ve pretty much accepted that I’ll never be the same as I was before (I meant to put a link in this post to one I wrote quite a while back called “Weight Off My Mind” – maybe I’ll do some editing to sneak it in.)

      Thanks so much for reading and commenting!!! I have YOUR blog in my weekly reader (which I’m running a little behind on) but I’ll be over soon to catch up!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Excellent post. I’m glad you were able to step back and get a fresh perspective. And that Bible verse is perfect! You sure don’t look pregnant to me.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks, sometimes a fresh perspective is hard to come by, especially right after it happens, and you feel hot-headed! But the more I thought about it, the sillier it seemed. Just before writing this, I was thinking it over (in the shower, no less) and I went from fuming to laughing hysterically about the whole thing. I remembered that verse and prayed blessings!

      Thanks for helping me focus on that “fresh perspective!”

      Liked by 1 person

  4. You are a very young looking 35! Sometimes people just don’t think before speaking, but I’m glad you decided not to let it get to you.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. You are TINY!! I don’t see evidence of a pregnancy. I so glad you reasoned with yourself. Its a powerful coping skill. Good for you letting it go 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Well, I am not “tiny” (like I used to be before the twins came along) but that’s okay with me, because I”m healthy. I know you know how hard it is not to take something like that so personally! Thanks for being here and understanding.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I really enjoyed reading this truthful, down-to-earth post (Heck, I enjoy reading ALL your posts!!!) but I didn’t like reading the part where the woman thought you were expecting and you weren’t!

    Then I saw the photo of you where you looked STUNNING…. like a model and the thing is….you didn’t look like you’re pregnant. I can’t help but wonder about women when they make that comment. I’m sure she wasn’t malicious, but it’s just not something you ask someone…that’s my two cents. It’s not a big deal. I’ve had people say the same thing to me when I wasn’t pregnant, and yes, it bummed me out, but the truth of the matter was that I kind of looked like I was expecting, unlike you! 😉 I’m proud of you for letting the water roll off your back. I also really like how you reframed the entire incident into something positive.

    I love the Disneyland pictures. The picture of you and the girls at Epcot is beyond precious. I’m so glad you got to bring your family there!

    XOXOXO to you and your amazing family!
    Dy

    p.s.
    Your Double Talk quote, Bible verse, Word that has lost its meaning, and Relatable lyrics were spot-on perfection!!!!!! (I love that section – it’s so cool and original – I’ve never seen anything like it.)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, Dyane! I’m so glad you read my blog! You always have such positive feedback, no matter how I’m feeling (whether I’m letting things roll off my back or letting it get to me and feeling all wet)!

      I, too, love the closing section, it’s one of my favorite parts to write. I especially liked the double talk quote, in particular, this time, it being so unwittingly fitting! Credit these precious kids and the good Lord!!!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Soooome people though. Really glad you let it go. You look very Hott! I do not see any pregnancy and even if you were what business was it of hers! Thank you for this post!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for the compliment. If you saw me in a side-view profile picture, you probably wouldn’t describe me as “hot,” LOL! My abs are not by any means “skinny,” but I doubt you would ask me if I was pregnant!!!

      You have a valid point…what if I (or anyone) were pregnant, but didn’t want to announce it yet. Yep, you’re right, none of her beeswax! That’s why my motto is ‘unless you’re sure, don’t mention it.’

      Thanks for reading!

      Liked by 1 person

      • So true. Never mind about the abs, beauty of being a mommy i guess 🙂 Great motto. If the tables had been turned she would not have liked it. Another motto: If you wouldn’t want anyone saying it to you, just don’t say it to someone else. Have a great day!

        Liked by 1 person

  8. How wonderfully you took your power back…you are a great role model…also, you look absolutely amazing…and, greater than that, you are beautiful from the inside out…thanks for sharing 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Inner beauty is far more stunning than our outward appearance, that’s so true.

      I like that, what you said, “took your power back.” Words can be so powerful if you let them!!! I thank and credit God for giving me the ability to put that different perspective on such a simple statement. Even just a few years ago, something like that probably would have crushed me rather than rolling off my back. God has brought me a long way!

      Liked by 1 person

      • I love hearing that….such growth and progress…I experienced something similar today, and continue to give God thanks and credit that I wasn’t intimidated today when faced with an issue at work…I faced things head on, and the outcome was amazingly gratifying. I’m happy for you…your hard work is paying off 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  9. Ugh. Why do people utter those words?! You are beautiful! Great pictures. And yes…it’s hard but as you said, do your best to let it go. xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

    • For real! Thanks. I actually weighed myself today and I’ve gained weight since writing this article (changed up medicine, you know how it goes) but I still don’t think I’m “pregnancy sized” (and even if I were…I still would feel the same about the comment!) Thanks for reading and commenting!!!!

      Liked by 1 person

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