“Are you excited?” Tia asked “Excited!” That’s the emotion I’m supposed to be feeling! “Yes,” I grinned trying my best to fake it. Hopefully, she won’t detect the fear and dread. Hopefully, no one will.
This day has been creeping up on me for a while now, and I’ve felt helpless to do much about it. It’s like staring up at a huge mountain in front of me. There’s no way around it, I’ve just got to climb.
It’s moving day today. We’re moving all of our essentials into a new house on the far outskirts of town, out in the country. The property is beautiful with a lovely (bigger) house; a perfect place to raise our family.
So why fear? Because I don’t embrace change easily. Having Bipolar disorder, even good change can throw me off kilter. Big life events have affected my stability before and I don’t want that to happen in the midst of a move!
And why dread? Because I have to pack years worth of things and get rid of what we really don’t need. This should be easy but I can be overly nostalgic at times. Plus, there’s a lot of my deceased and beloved father in this old house that I’ll be leaving behind. Memories of yesteryear and things of his still in the attic… at least I’ll have another week after this one come back and go through that stuff (we’re just moving the main things and ourselves today – we have another week or so to get the rest out). Then there’s the part about moving with two two-year olds. Enough said.
It’s going to be a hectic day. It’s almost 6 am the kids will be up soon and no, I haven’t packed all my essentials yet, but I’ll have some help from my husband, Amor and Sister and brother-in-law. With a little luck and a lot of prayer, I’ll climb this mountain today and at least get to the top! (I’ll worry about unpacking, moving the rest and climbing down later.)
Please take this mountain before me and move it. Cast it into the sea. Give me the strength to make this move with ease and not feel like I’m climbing or falling. Help me to remain stable through it all. I trust in You to keep me in perfect peace during this move. In Jesus name, I pray, Amen.
(Sat. Sept 17, 2016)
Double Talk Quote: “Daddy’s Joe-ing Moe’s yard” (Daddy’s mowing Joe’s yard) – Mica, laughing at herself, “You should use that as one of your quotes, mommy.”
Bible Verse: “…if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.” Matthew 17:20
Word that has lost its meaning: excitement (I’m sure I will be once we get settled!)
Relatable Lyrics: “Where the Green Grass Grows” – Tim McGraw
“I’m gonna live where the green grass grows
Watch my corn pop up in rows
Every night be tucked in close, to you
Raise our kids where the good Lord’s blessed
Point our rockin’ chairs towards the west
And plant our dreams where the peaceful river flows
Where the green grass grows”