Excuse me? Huh? What? Are you serious? Do my ears deceive me? How do you figure? Did you really just say that? The questions raced through my brain. Unfortunately, our conversation was abruptly interrupted (betcha can’t guess how) and I didn’t get a chance to ask the veteran mom-of-twins any of these questions before we had to leave.
Right after my babes were born, I asked a fellow mom-of-twins, whose boys were nine years old, if she had any wisdom or advice for me. She bluntly told me that she didn’t remember anything from the first two years due to the stress, lack of sleep, and chaos that having two babies at one time brings. She was the first of many mom-of-twins to tell me that the first two years are a blur.
I wondered if the veteran mom who made the title comment had contracted the ever-so-prevalent fugue state illness, known as “Mommy Brain.” Earlier in our conversation, she mentioned that her twins were in kindergarten. I’ve heard that by this age twins “entertain themselves,” (although moms have to be more vigilant of competitiveness and more attentive to conflict intervention / resolution). Maybe over the past three years she, too had forgotten the first few years. Or maybe she just had easy babies. Or Maybe she’s just a better mom than me. Or maybe she finds it easier because she doesn’t have Bipolar disorder. So many maybes…
I’ve been a mom to a “singleton.” It wasn’t easy. It wasn’t that she was disobedient or misbehaved, or out of hand. Being a mom is a lot of work. (You’ve read the Mommy Resume!) As I’ve written before, “here’s my equation: Double that (2 year old twins) + 8-year-old daughter + marital challenges + financial difficulties + changing environment (baby Asher leaving, 7-year old Hope becoming like a 4th child to me) + Bipolar disorder & anxiety issues = “’God I need your help’”
So the veteran mom is a SuperMom for sure, as are many of my other friends and acquaintances who have multiples or multiple children. Just because I’m not as confident or centered doesn’t mean I’m not a SuperMommy too! And here’s why:
Because God helps me get through day by day, minute by minute. Regardless of whether they are taking turns napping, throwing food across the table at one another, having meltdowns, or pulling their diapers off and running away from me. I have the patience to deal with whatever comes my way, simply because God works through me daily and I feel privileged to have the above equation.
God gave me a lot of responsibilities because he wanted to show himself through me. He wants to be glorified in me. If I had had a singleton instead of twins, then maybe I wouldn’t have felt the need to lean on Him so much. And with this great responsibility comes great joy.
And if anyone ever tells you that “Twins are So Much Easier Than a Singleton,” you have my permission to tell them that it has been scientifically proven that that simply is not true! (You have the archives of my blog as evidence to back it up.)
Double Talk Quote: Me to Bella, who was throwing a fit “What’s the big problem here?” “Dada!” (I still don’t know the details but he did something to make her raging mad!)
Bible Verse: “…From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.” Luke 12:48
Word that had Lost its meaning (there for a minute): confidence
Relatable Lyrics: My own personal lyrics to DJ Khaled’s “All I Do Is Win”
All I Do is Twin!
All I do is twin twin twin no matter what
Got laundry on my mind I can never get it done
And every time I step up in the buildin’
Everybody hands go up
And they stay there
And they say yeah
And they stay there
Up down, up down, up down
‘Cause all I do is twin twin twin
And if you goin’ in put your hands in the air
Make ’em stay there
I never go no where
But they saying Mommy’s back…
My hands go up and down like babies’ booty’s go…
Y’all better count me in
Got empty bank accounts, accountants count me zip…
Cause all I do, all I, all I, all I
All I do is…Twin!